“Understanding the Male of the Species”

Kelly G. Antwine, M.Ed., LPC

Kelly Antwine presented a verbal time-lapse picture of how the “Male of the Species” developed into what it is today.  Cultural pressures have shaped the roles in the home.  Prior to World War, 27% of the families lived on what they could produce on less than 100 acres of their homestead.   Neighbors helped each other.  Children worked along side their parents.  After the War, we clustered into the new invention called “suburbs.”
On the negative side, he explained how men have deteriorated relationally after returning from the War.

  • Men no longer worked with their sons out on the farm producing the family’s sustenance.  Instead, they worked in the factory, away from the family.
  • Men no longer worked cooperatively with one another in mutual assistance.  Instead, they competed for the ever-narrowing opportunities for advancement.
  • Men no longer valued their worth on the blessings that provided dignity.  Instead, they turned to status defined by income and material possessions for their worth.

On the positive side, he called for restored manhood by

  • sharing emotions and vulnerability with one another, implying that transparency builds intimacy.
  • taking back the responsibility of training our sons how to be persons of integrity, refusing to outsource that responsibility to “professionals” like daycare workers and teachers.
  • entering into a personal relationship with God that is genuine and authentic, resisting the temptation to just going through the motions of religious rituals that have little personal meaning.

Lots of good food for thought.  The North D/FW Chapter of the Christian Counselors of Texas organized the meeting which deserved more attendance than came.  Kelly is a Licensed Professional Counselor at Preston Place Counseling in Dallas.  He has a lot of experience with addiction recovery and can be contacted at 972-960-2222 or Kelly@PrestonPlaceCounseling.com.

One Response to “Understanding the Male of the Species”

  1. Dr. J. says:

    Good interview on NPR: “Dads: Helping Boys Form Deep Friendships”
    September 13, 2011

    A recent parenting conversation about boys friendships featured moms and researcher Niobe Way, who finds that boys crave and value deep friendships with each other, but American ideas of masculinity make these bonds tougher to keep as boys grow older. Now two fathers and a young male weigh in on the research and discuss their own friendships.


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